The mean old mom strikes again -- Episode 23

There are times in parenting where you just have to say, "because I said so" and leave it at that.  While I could come up with a million reasons to back myself up, I am the mother, I get the last say, and that's just the way the cards were dealt.  My boys are fully aware of this undisclosed rule, but they often like to challenge it, just to see if it still exists.  

It still exists.  It is. It was. It shall ever remain in existence. Amen.

Recently they tried to pull a fast one on me and thought, just maybe, they were going to get away with it this time.....no.such.luck.buck-o.   Their high school has a Campus King and Queen each spring.  It's nothing major, but does require contestants to fill out a resume of sorts and show up, dressed nicely, on a Sunday afternoon for an interview with real live judges.  Then, the results are tallied and a couple of weeks later on Saturday night they stroll across the high school stage, dressed nicely, and the winners are announced. 

My boys know they are required to participate in such school activities....it's not a question at our house.  I expect them to do it, and no, not just "because I said so", even though I can enforce that rule if needed.  But rather, because it's character building, it's a great start to learning communication skills and the interview process, properly speaking about yourself, your future, your ambitions in life, it's fun to dress up and look all spiffy for a change, it's an awesome opportunity to build up your resume from year to year so that when the time comes for college...presto! you have already done the hard research to make YOU look your best on paper!

This year, both of my boys elected to forego informing me of the upcoming Campus King and Queen.  They thought their silence would win in the end.  They were wrong.  Bless their immature hearts, their mama is always going to find out.  Fortunately, a good friend asked, "why didn't the boys sign up for Campus King this year, I thought for sure they'd be in it."  That was all the fuel I needed to light a fire under their unassuming tails. And so, I promptly got in touch with the sponsor and said, "add their names to the list, they are in.  In fact, just keep their names on the list from now until they graduate, there is no need to ask them or me, just always know they will be participating, I don't care what they try to tell you at school."

And so, we raced around for the next 36 hours acquiring their interview attire.  Amidst the moans and groans and repititious  "I can't believe you are making us do this", we managed to pull it together.  I said, "guys, this is easy, it's an interview all about you, all the questions are going to be about your life, you can't get any of the answers wrong, it's the best process ever".   However, on the drive to the school building for interviews, I did give only a couple of instructions: 

• Try to remember they are not asking for yes or no answers, expound on your answers. If they ask what your favorite subject is in school, please do not say P.E., and DO NOT, under any circumstances, say something mean about your brother during your interview.

Campus King can only be awarded to a guy in grades 10-12, Elder Son and Middle Child are in grades 9 and 7.  So, they can't win, but they can try to secure an alternate position.  Elder Son has placed the last two years he has entered.  This is Middle Child's first year, and while his first goal was to be crowned King, once he realized that was not a possibility, his primary goal changed to just beating his brother. Oh, the love.   Anyway, interview day arrives, met with much anticipation.  They waited in the classroom until their time slot opened for them to be escorted to the interview room and stand alone before the judges. 

Elder Son did fantastic.  He's calm, cool and collected.  He answers his questions with ease.  When asked to name a song that describes him, he said "Dirt Road Anthem"....we live on a dirt road, he's pretty laidback, so "chillin' on a dirt road" does speak to his life right now.  When asked what he would do with a million dollars,  he answered he'd like to get a lakehouse (he loves the water, loves floating a river and fishing with his Daddy, loves family time on the lake) bless his sweet heart, I'll buy one for him if I get a million dollars one day too.  When asked about his community volunteer work, he responded by telling of how he helped deliver meals to our tornado victims last April.  When asked, besides a family member, tell us someone you admire most, he answered that his principal had great leadership abilities, was also an excellent coach, cared about every kid at the school and showed that on a daily basis, in and out of the classroom, on and off campus.  He's my more reserved child, the oldest, the reponsible one. 

Now, I'm going to give you a dialogue of just part of Middle Child's interview:

~So, what's your favorite subject in school?

• "well, I really want to say P.E., but I guess I'll say History or Reading. Right now I'm reading a book that took place in 793 A.D. and it's about these Anglo-Saxon siblings who are kidnapped by vikings...."....and he rambles on for a minute or two giving his complete dissertation of the current book he's reading.   

~What song best describes you?

• "I'm sexy and I know it" ---  yes, he really said that. And he didn't pause a second before answering.  And afterwards, bursts of laughter erupted from the interview room and the judges informed him he was the first one that day who had an immediate answer , many said they couldn't think of one.  Oh, a fine, shining, proud moment as a mother.  He answered with "I'm sexy and I know it"....He's 12. 

~Who do you think is the coolest girl, it can be a celebrity, a family member, a fellow student, anyone...

• (pointing to the table of  female judges, he cleverly answers) "If I choose one of you do I get extra points?"  Laughter erupts again and he knows he's got them reeled in with his undeniable charm.  But he continues on to give a real answer, "I'd have to say Betty White." (what? you've got to be kidding me, he said Betty White?) 
• Well, that's a great answer, but why did you choose her?  "Well, is really funny even though she's old, she's like 90 or something, and she's still working, I mean she's just really cool like that"  (More laughter)

~Why do you think you should be chosen over your brother for Campus King?

• "Um, my mother said we were not allowed to talk about my brother during the interview"

~(amidst giggling again) Okay then, why don't you just tell us why YOU should win Campus King? 

• "Well, (combing his hand through his hair), because I'm "me" and I'm wearing this pin stripe vest...and we all know pin stripes are awesome"

Win, lose or draw....pin stripe vests are awesome indeed.  Now, I guess I need to sign him up for a self-esteem class to build his confidence a little, huh?  I'm sexy and I know it.....oh. my. lands.   He doesn't meet a stranger.  He doesn't stress out about much, if anything.  He is bright, witty, a clear thinker, an intelligent old soul inside a young little body.  As my brother-in-law always says, "he's never going to need blood pressure medication in his life."  He rolls with the punches and smiles the whole way.

We don't know the results yet, that's still many days away, but I do know that I am proud of both Elder Son and Middle Child.  They rocked their interviews in their Sunday attire and they didn't even complain one minute afterwards.  Secretly, I think they enjoyed it although you will never get them to admit it.  I did however, kiss Elder Son on the cheek back at home and quietly whispered..."thanks for doing Campus King", he smiled sweetly at me and replied "I didn't mind, it wasn't that bad"  which is cool guy speak for "mama, you are the best, I am so glad you make us do this stuff that we really don't want to do because no one else's mama is making them do it, but in the end I know it's going to help us and it's really fun when you get down to it and when I'm all grown up I will look back on this and be even more appreciative" -- or something along those lines.  :)